It’s all in your head.
How many times have you heard that?
You think you’re getting fired or broken up with—just because your boss or boyfriend wants to talk.
You imagine you’re in a fight because your best friend doesn’t text back.
You know everyone is smirking at your unflattering photo on Facebook.
The truth of it is, it is all in your head.
All angst is self-created.
In each situation above, an event simply happened—you were asked to have a conversation, someone didn’t return your text, a photo was posted online.
These are all occurrences and don’t mean anything on their own.
The nervousness and tension come only from your thoughts about each event.
Oh, glory be! What a revelation! Thank you, Brooke Castillo.
Over the past several weeks, I’ve been basking in Brooke’s calm, clear wisdom on The Life Coach School podcast.
She teaches about fear, failure, success, unconditional love, money management, weight loss, relationships, goal setting, and so much more.
At the heart of all of her teachings is how to manage your mind. Once the mind is managed, she explains, you have all the power.
If you liked my blog post on the Worry-Free Diet, you will love Brooke’s podcast.
Here are just a few snippets to give you a taste:
“Our thoughts create our feelings, our feelings drive our actions, and our actions create our results. Now, a lot of us don’t realize that many of our thoughts are not serving us. We think that it’s the circumstances of our lives that are creating our experience in the world and really what it is, it’s our thinking about our lives that is creating our experience in in the world. […] Are we really making the choice of what we want to think in our lives?”
“There are things in the world that happen that we have no control over. Other people, our past, things that have happened to us—we have no control over those things, but we do have control over how we think about those things and what we make those things mean.”
“Decide what you want to think on purpose. If you don’t tell your brain what to focus on, or what to think about, it will go to the old patterns. The brain likes to do what it’s really good at and what it’s really good at is stuff that it’s done a lot of. Unfortunately for many of us, that’s a lot of very negative, anxiety-producing, frustration-producing thinking.”
“The reason why we’re unable to control our reactions in our life is because we’re unaware of the thoughts and feelings driving them. Once we become aware, it becomes much easier to notice the thought and the feeling before the reaction happens and to make a deliberate choice there. Ultimately, the choice can happen at the thought level when you start directing your mind and telling it what to think.”
"Managing your mind and deciding what you want it to think about is the secret to a happy life. Period.”
If you want to dive in and learn how to question your thoughts and transform them in a deliberate, compassionate way, I highly recommend Brooke’s podcast. Her instructions are clear and her examples are so relatable.
She’ll give you solid tools to manage your mind and choose happiness, should you so desire.
Happy listening, all.